[Neurons] 2020 Neurons #16 WHEN YOU'RE STUCK AT HOME

[Michael Hall]

From: L. Michael Hall 

2020 Neurons #16

April 6, 2020

Living through 

the Coronavirus Pandemic #1

              

WHEN YOU'RE STUCK AT HOME

Will You Make it Better or Bitter?

 

All sorts of things could be happening these days when the "world has shut
down," and you are stuck at home- good things and not-so good things.  Among
the good things- you have more time to catch up on your sleep and exercise.
You have time to catch up on your reading.  You have more time for quality
time with family and friends.  You have some time for reflection about life,
career, family, etc.

 

Yet these good things could become not-so-good things if you don't know how
to achieve these activities.  Without the skills to be able to be productive
doing these things- the extra time may turn into insomnia, dosing during the
day, fighting and fussing with loved ones, worry, anxiety, panic, and so on.

 

Those good things presuppose certain skills.   For example, how to exercise
at home if you don't have your own personal gym.  How to organize your day
and operate from some sort of schedule.  When your normal schedule is
disrupted as it is for millions and perhaps billions of people-you have to
be able to create your own schedule and follow it.  That requires
discipline.  For many people, their days are determined by others and
external influences, not by their own choice- so having "nothing to do,"
becomes a big problem for them.  They now need the skill and discipline of
ordering their lives by their own choice.  Without that, they can feel lost,
bored, out-of-control, frustrated, angry, etc.

 

Skill is the first thing that you might have noticed that you need.  And, of
course, where there is skill there is background knowledge and
understanding.  You have to know how to do certain things, how to organize
it, and how to decide to make it happen.  If skill refers to your behaviors
and actions- what you do, knowledge refers to your mental state of
understanding and being able to "manage your mind" so it doesn't run away in
an undisciplined way and create all sorts of grief for you.

 

The solution begins with skill and knowledge, but it doesn't end there.
Behind skill and knowledge is a higher level of your mind- your ability to
set values (to value), make decisions, and inspire yourself to do what needs
to be done (motivation).  Knowing what to do and having the competent
ability to do it is the first thing.  But will you?  This highlights the
knowing-doing gap.  You know more than you do.  If only you could get
yourself to do what you know.

 

Here in Colorado we have been in a stay at home order for about five weeks.
Long before the official "Stay at Home" order came by the governor,
everything closed down- Starbucks closed the reading room, the gym closed,
all restaurants closed dinning rooms, even McDonalds closed.  Essentially
there was no where to go anyway!

 

I immediately set up my own reading room, bought a small coffee percolator
and created my own "Starbucks."  So to keep with my schedule, I arise, do
300 crunches, cook breakfast, and then read for two hours in my "Starbucks"
dining room.  After that comes checking emails and working on the computer
writing articles.   That takes me to about two in the afternoon- exercise
time.  I change into exercise outfit and head to the garage where I have a
few weights and a place to work out.  After that, there's shower, more work
at the computer, maybe more reading, and from time to time a trip to the
grocery store.  Then about every third-day we drive to some mountain trails
and hike/run them.  Eventually it is dinner time (six o'clock for us).  The
evening is for watching movies.  Geraldine shares the schedule with me and
does some coaching sessions either in the day or evening.

 

A schedule can keep you sane.  By giving structure to your day, it allows
you to do things that are meaningful, introduce enough variety to keep you
alert and active, and at the end of the day enables you to feel that you
have been productive.  A schedule also stabilizes your mind as it gives you
direction and focus.

 

Now if you don't do these things - here is the nightmare that you can create
for yourself.  First because you "have nothing to do" and because what you
want to do, you can't- you start to feel frustrated and upset.  That then
gives you the time and situation to worry about all sorts of things that at
that moment you can do nothing about.  This is a great formula for misery,
unhappiness, and irritation.  As this builds, you feel more and more stress.
Then with irritable stress, you are more likely to take it out on someone.
That someone could be you- feeling more and more stress, you might turn it
into headaches, backaches, stomach problems.  That someone could be your
loved ones, your kids, your friends.  You could start to become "a pain in
the ass" to them with all your complaints, accusations, irritations.  If
they respond in kind, you could now create fights and arguments. 

 

Will your home life become better or bitter as you are stuck at home?  Will
it lead you to feel unresourceful- anxious and depressed, or stressed-out
and suicidal?  Will it lead to the kind of interpersonal stress that so many
families experience during the holidays?  Or will it lead you to become more
resourceful- and use the experience creatively to build up new competencies?


 

What many are doing in the field of NLP and what we are also doing in
Neuro-Semantics is providing some of the courses online.  Additionally, many
Meta-Coaches have shifted to do all of their coaching via skype, zoom, or
another platform.  And that could very well be the opportunity that you need
to begin building up your ability to stay personally resourceful regardless
of the circumstance while we're waiting for the world to start up again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

L. Michael Hall, Ph.D.

Executive Director, Neuro-Semantics

P.O. Box 8

Clifton CO. 81520 USA

www.neurosemantics.com   

 

The stunning new history of NLP--- NLP Secrets.  

Investigative Journalism which has exposed what has been kept secrets for
decades. 

http://www.neurosemantics.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/NLP-Secrets-2_sml2.
png

 

 

 

 

 

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