[Neurons] 2017 Neurons #43 The Hardest Person You'll Ever Seek to Persuade

Mon Sep 18 08:56:58 EDT 2017

From: L. Michael Hall

2017 Neurons #43

September 18, 2017

THE HARDEST PERSON

YOU'LL EVER SEEK TO PERSUADE

Someone asked me recently about the newest Neuro-Semantic book, Inside-Out
Persuasion, "Why did you write about that?"  I asked, "You mean about the
subject of persuasion?"  "Yes, why persuasion?  You already wrote
Mind-Lines: Lines for Changing Minds, so why another book on persuasion?"

Now because the questioner was a Meta-Coach, I said "Because I want you
persuasive.  Then I added, "And I want you to be persuasive in a respectful
and ethical way."  After all, that is a win for you and a win for me.  As
you enhance your skills of persuasion, you will be much more successful in
getting clients, getting into organizations, and influencing the people that
you need and want to influence.  And that will open many doors of
opportunity for you to make a difference for individuals, families,
companies, etc.  And that's a win for me because your success is my success.

That immediately brought up another concern and the person's second
question, "You know I think I have a problem with persuading myself.
There's still some things that I know and believe in- things that I am still
not doing."  My comment to that was, "Well, welcome to the club!   You now
know the hardest person of all to persuade!"

Strange?  Well, let's explore this idea.  How are you at persuading
yourself?  How are you at getting yourself to do and follow-through on what
you want to do?  Ah, yes, the old knowing-doing gap again!  We know what to
do to improve our health, our fitness, our business, our relationships, our
finances, our wealth creation, and on and on and yet how many of us also
have a challenge in actually doing what we know we should do?

The principle here is this- if you can't persuade yourself to do what you
want to do-how will you be able to persuade others?  How will you be able to
positively influence those who you want to touch with the value that you can
offer?  In terms of persuasion, the first person to persuade then is you.
So, how are you at that? 

This also has other multiple applications and implications.  One of the
things that I found in modeling highly persuasive people is that the
ultimate form of persuasion is character- and specifically being authentic.
As examples of that, I wrote some brief descriptions of John F. Kennedy,
Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King, Jr., and Winston Churchill.  And yes,
while they all also were skillful in their language skills, elegant in
communicating inspiring ideas, and inspirational- they were best at
persuasion because they were authentic.  They were totally convinced about
what they were saying.

"All of these masters of persuasion also operated from a solid ethical
character.  While they had sweet words and elegant ways of speaking, they
source of their influence was the character of their person- they lived in
an inside-out persuasion. ...  They persuaded by being an example of the
meanings that they communicated." (p. 17)

Here's what I wrote in the Foreword of the book:

"... self-persuasion comes first and perhaps I the most challenging form of
persuasion.  Self-persuasion also comes before self-leadership because if I
cannot lead myself or manage myself about what I'm not convinced of, I will
not be able to influence others." (p. 7)

Yes, the hardest person that you will ever attempt to persuade is probably
you!  This explains why it is easier to intellectually know and understand
something and to make a decisive commitment to act on what you know.
"Knowing" is easy compared to acting.  At the point where you act-
consequences occur.  Now you could not succeed, or you could find out that
you were wrong, or you could not do it well.  Maybe you will discover that
you are incompetent.  So it is very human to procrastinate, to put off, to
study more.  Questions:

           Given all of that, how are you at truly persuading yourself?

           Do you know how to best influence your own thinking, feeling,
deciding, and acting?

           Are you actually persuaded about what you "know" you should do? 

           If you are, then are you now acting on that persuasion?  Would
you like to be?

Interesting enough, the very term "persuasion" has within it the idea of
thoroughness, "to thoroughly urge" someone to do something.  Persuasion
implies action and commitment.  When we say that we have persuaded someone
or that we are persuaded about something, there's no longer any doubts or
questions.  We are sold on something.  The communication process has reached
a conclusion.  When you persuade someone about the value of coaching, you
know that they are ready to sign up.  When you persuade a manager or leader
in an organization, you know that you are getting in.

An interesting exercise for yourself, or for someone you wish to influence,
is to make a list of the things that you know but do not do.  You can even
do this with an organization.  We have had trainers go into companies and,
using the whiteboards or flip charts in the training room, start making a
list of all of the things that they have learned from trainings that have
not been transferred to the work place.  With a list of things that you know
but do not do - you can now ask the persuasion questions: 

Are you persuaded about the value of this idea?

How persuaded are you?  Gauge your level of persuasion from 0 to 10.

What doubts or questions do you have about this thing that you know?

What stops you from making a decisive commitment to act on it?

What do you need to persuade you to take effective action on it?

Now you know why I called it, inside-out persuasion.  That's where it
starts.

L. Michael Hall, Ph.D.

               Neuro-Semantics Executive Director 

               Neuro-Semantics International

P.O. Box 8

Clifton, CO. 81520 USA                             

               1 970-523-7877 

                    Dr. Hall's email:
<mailto:meta at acsol.net\hich\af31506\dbch\af31505\loch\f31506> meta at acsol.net

    ISNS new logo

What is Neuro-Semantic NLP?

Neurons:  Get your free subscription to the weekly International \Post on
Neuro-Semantics by Dr. L. Michael Hall. Subscribe at:
wwww.neurosemantics.com

    Coaching: For world-class Coach Training - The Meta-Coaching System,
<http://www.neurosemantics.com/metacoaching>
www.neurosemantics.com/metacoaching   Meta-Coach Reflections sent every
Wednesday to the group of Licensed Meta-Coaches.
<http://www.metacoachfoundation.org> www.metacoachfoundation.org  

Self-Actualization: Neuro-Semantics launched the New Human Potential
Movement in 2007, for information about this, see
<http://www.self-actualizing.org/> www.self-actualizing.org  

NSP --- Neuro-Semantic Publications: Order books from Neuro-Semantic
website,  <http://www.neurosemantics.com/> www.neurosemantics.com  click on
Products and Services and then the Catalogue of books.  Order via paypal.  

-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: <https://pairlist8.pair.net/pipermail/neurons/attachments/20170918/bd54e2b4/attachment-0001.html>
-------------- next part --------------
A non-text attachment was scrubbed...
Name: image001.jpg
Type: image/jpeg
Size: 10627 bytes
Desc: not available
URL: <https://pairlist8.pair.net/pipermail/neurons/attachments/20170918/bd54e2b4/attachment-0001.jpg>