[Neurons] 2010 Meta Reflections #60

[L. Michael Hall]

From: L. Michael Hall

Meta Reflections 2010 - #60

Dec. 6,  2010

 

 

 

META-STATING AND EMOTIONS

Part IV                 

                                    

 

 

If the Meta-States Model offers anything, it offers some very powerful
processes for detecting your emotions and managing those emotions from a
higher level.  When most people first experience Meta-States as a Model, the
process seems counter-intuitive, it seems paradoxical, and the last thing
they would have thought of or utilize for emotional mastery- yet it is the
most effective method.

 

So what does the Meta-States Model say about "emotions?"  First that there
are levels of emotions; that is, emotions do not occur just at one level,
but multiple levels.  First there are primary emotions -direct and emotions
that are in direct response to a stimulus in the world. Theorists tend to
posit that there are anywhere from 7 to perhaps 20 primary emotions.  I
follow Robert Plutchik (The Emotions) who posited the following primary
emotions: joy / sorrow; anger / fear; anticipation / surprise; acceptance /
disgust; tension / relaxation; love / apathy.  Then, when you begin mixing
these primary emotions, you get secondary emotions - similar to how mixing
primary colors gives secondary colors.

 

Then above and beyond primary emotions and various mixtures of those
emotions, there are the meta-emotions of your meta-states.  These arise due
to your self-reflexive consciousness as you associate emotions to emotional
states.  To detect these and to flush them out, just inquire, "What do you
think and feel about X state?"  

What do you think and feel about anger?  What emotions do you experience
when you experience anger?  Or fear, sadness, anxiety, guilt, tenderness,
love, joy, etc.?

 

Now generally speaking, when you bring a negative emotion against a previous
emotion, you set the second negative emotion as a frame about and over the
first emotion.  Now you have fear of anger; anger at your fear; shame about
your guilt; fear of relaxation; anxiety about anger, and so on.  Do this and
you construct a "dragon state" within your mind-body system so that you are
essentially in self-attack.  And the energy of the meta-emotional state has
no where to go except against your mind-body system.  Then you will pay for
this construct by experiencing mental and emotional suffering.

 

Yet here also begins the processes that seem paradoxical and
counter-intuitive.  If you bring emotional states as acceptance,
observation, interest, curiosity, appreciation, learning, etc. to your
negative emotions, your "negative" emotion will change.  Typically the
intensity level of the energy of the emotion will be reduced so that you'll
be able to handle it much better.   Calm anger, acceptance of fear,
curiosity about sadness, appreciation of anger, etc. transforms the primary
emotional state so that it can be much more useful and resourceful.

 

When you meta-state your primary emotional state with resourceful emotional
states, you are in a position to qualify your emotional states in ways that
will transform them into allies that will support you rather than diminish
you.  So in Neuro-Semantics, we don't repress emotions, nor do we suppress
them as much as we meta-state them and transform them into resources.  This
creates a new level of emotional intelligence and effectiveness.

 

So when you next experience a negative state, the first thing to do is to
bring a state of calmness to the experience.  Step back in your mind for
just a moment and appreciate that you just received a signal- a
communication signal.  And just observe it.  What is the signal about?
Something "out there" in the world?  Something within your mental mapping
about something?  What?

 

Next bring states of curiosity, interest, and exploration to your primary
state.  Curiously explore how you just created that negative emotion.
Accepting that the emotion is yours, and that you created it within your
mind-body system, you now have an unprecedented opportunity for deepening
your self-knowledge and self-control.  Wow!   And, once you discover the
process, then you can meta-state yourself with a strong sense of commitment
to yourself and others as you choose the best way to respond to the
situation that has triggered the emotion.

 

This means that you are creating new adjustments to your life-coping maps,
making yourself more effective, enriching your relationships, and properly
using your emotions, especially your negative ones.  And while doing this,
meta-state yourself that it is just an emotion (not "you," don't identify
with the emotion and personalize it).   It is just an emotion- a somatic
energy response giving you a signal.  Now you can choose:




What would be the best response I can now make?

Act on it; explore it some more; notice and ignore it; act against it; etc.?

Is the emotion appropriate, accurate, useful?

What resource would texture and qualify it making it more ecological for me?

 

Emotions - we all have them, they are a vital and important part of our
mind-body system, and like the rest of the system, they are fallible and can
easily be mis-used, abused, and become problematic for us.  Emotional
mastery and intelligence requires awareness, monitoring, managing,
meta-stating, and then using them effectively.

 

 

 

 

 

 

For more about Neuro-Semantic NLP --- 

          See www.neurosemantics.com 

 

Details for the First International Neuro-Semantic NLP Conference is now on
the website.  Click "Trainings" and "NS Conference" for the information and
video .

 

 

            Registration will begin in January 2011.

 

 

 

 

 

 

L.  Michael Hall, Ph.D.

Neuro-Semantics Executive Director  ----   <http://www.neurosemantics.com/>
www.neurosemantics.com

P.O. Box 8

Clifton, CO.  81520 USA                             ----
<http://www.self-actualizing.org/> www.self-actualizing.org

1 970-523-7877                                               ----
<http://www.meta-coaching.org/> www.meta-coaching.org

 

     

For a free subscription to Neurons--- the Internatioinal  egroup of
Neuro-Semantics, go to the front page of  <http://www.neurosemantics.com/>
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Reflection articles by Dr. Hall are sent out every Monday (Colorado time).
Trainers' Reflections are on Tuesdays and Meta-Coach Reflections on
Wednesdays.   Contact Dr. Hall at  meta at acsol.net  

 

 

 

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