[Neurons] 2023 Neurons #48 A PEAK INSIDE MY THINKING

Thu Nov 2 10:11:49 EDT 2023

From: L. Michael Hall

2023 Neurons #48

Nov. 1, 2023

This is only my opinion.

A Psychological Solution #4

A PEAK INSIDE MY THINKING

If you have been following the news since the outbreak of the Hamas-Israel
War three weeks ago, you know that there are hundreds of articles and videos
presenting all sorts of political arguments.  From the political
point-of-view, there are apologists arguing for the right of Hamas to do the
Oct. 7 massacre, the right of the Palestinians to send rockets over into
Israel, the right of Israel to defend itself, by bombing the hell out of the
Gaza strip, etc.  I have seen a dozen videos about the "historical argument"
about who has the right to the land and who does not. 

When I wrote, A Political Solution (Neurons #45), my thinking went like
this: Whatever happens in the War, and whatever happens politically, I have
really no influence about that.  Hearing Mahmoud Abbas, the President of the
Palestinian Authority, say that Hamas does not represent "his people," I
distinguished three groups in the conflict: Hamas, Palestinians, Israelis.
Of course, there are other groups: Hezbollah, Iran, the US government, Iraq,
etc.  But my purpose was not political, it was psychological.

Psychologically, when the War is over, and things are back to some kind of
"normality," there will be a whole lot of hurting people.  That's my
concern.  There will be refugees displaced from their homes, there will be
lots of deaths to mourn, a new political structures has to be built, and on
and on.  What can we then do about any of that?

My thought is that first we offer healing in the form of trauma recovery,
resilience, resourcefulness, good grief processing, etc.  The next thing,
the long-term thing, is to start to get people to accept life conditions,
tolerate other people (rather than kill them), and forgive.  In
Neuro-Semantics and NLP we are fully equipped and ready for trauma recovery
and resilience.  We know how to do that.  We can also train, coach, and
consult people on owning their personal power and becoming more resourceful
in re-building life, not as victims, but as victors within their own lives. 

But if we want to begin planting the seeds for a future without ongoing
bombing of each other and terrorist acts and war-then we need to begin
empowering people to transform.  How do they need to transform?   They need
to move from hate to love; from intolerance to tolerance; from
non-acceptance and rejection to acceptance.  They need to move from revenge
killing to releasing the past and getting over it.  They need to move to
thinking about the future and living together without war.   It was to that
end that I wrote the first articles on A Psychological Solution.  

Could everybody hear that?  Obviously, not everyone.  Many were too
emotional, too angry, too afraid, too upset, frustrated, too much in a state
of revenge, too unforgiving, etc.  Some made simplistic ethnocentric
decisions, "Anyone I care about or agrees with my religion is a good guy,
everybody else is bad and evil."  Some were personalizing too much, others
were over-generalizing, doing either/or thinking, polarizing,
emotionalizing, etc.  Their thinking was dominated and controlled by
Cognitive Distortions.  I don't blame any of them, not even for the
accusations that some hurled at me.  I knew that it was their emotions
talking and that they were talking out of hurt and angry states.  It's human
nature to do so.

And it is also human nature to rise above that!  We can do better.  That's
what we teach in all of the Self-Actualization Trainings.  We are made for
something so much better than hate, anger, fear, revenge, etc.!  We can
transcend that and we have the power to create a brighter and better future.
That's what I want to say.  Let's move toward a better way for all people
getting along.

I wrote the second article, Getting Over the Past (Neurons #46) to address
the "historical argument."  As a psychologist, I spoke to it first as to
individuals, then I addressed it as applicable to a group.  The historical
argument is completely destructive individually.  People live their whole
lives upset, angry, scared, rageful, revengeful, etc. because of some
childhood trauma constantly demanding that someone change the past.  Or,
that the traumatic past somehow justifies them in being angry, a victim,
revengeful, or demanding.  It does not work for individuals.  It does not
work for nations.

We have to move on.  In listening to the "historical argument," the
pro-Palestinians argue about 1947/ 1948 saying it was their land.  Others
argue that it was never their land, that 1881 the Jews started to return to
a barren land and they were the ones who built the cities and fields.
Others go back centuries before, to the 7th century.  Then others go back to
Moses, 3,500 years ago when he brought the Israelites to the land.  In the
end we are left with more questions, not fewer.  What history really counts?
Whose memory is the real one?  It is an endless argument that can never be
solved to everyone's satisfaction.  Psychologically this argument is a
Logical Fallacy, a red herring.  Solving that will not change anything today
politically.

That brings us back to today and what we will do when the War ends.  In
terms of the psychology of control, in terms of responsibility to/for- all
we can do (since we are not the political leaders) is to do what we can to
help people recover from the trauma, become resilience and resourceful, and
transform so that this kind of thing doesn't happen again.

To that end, I hope that we can persuade Arab NLP and Neuro-Semantic
trainers to go to the Palestinians with these offerings.  We have never had
a Palestinian NLP Center.  I believe we will need one for the future.
Israel already has an NLP Association, so they can take care of that.  I
have proposed this to the NLP Leadership Summit and dozens have responded
saying, "count me in."  When the day comes, I, for one, am ready to go and
offer our Neuro-Semantic trainings at my own expense.

What does L. Michael Hall Really Think?

After writing the previous blog, we had an extended discussion with the ISNS
Leadership Team.  I added the following.  My writings on this subject have
led some to assert numerous false things.  Among them are things that I'm
told that I believe and intend(!) which actually I do not.  That led me to
wonder, "How could the writings be mis-interpreted that much?" Several on
the team helped me understand some of the twisted framing that some are
using to distort what I wrote, thereby preventing people from clear
understanding what I actually wrote.

For example, some said that I was writing to promote Zionist propaganda and
to take Israel's side in the war.  Not only am I not on Israel's sidem I
have not even thought about "sides."  "Sides" presuppose there's a good side
and a bad side.  I find that such either/or thinking not only
over-simplifies, it perpetuates the conflict as it sets up a false
polarization.   If I'm to take sides, I'm on the side of human beings
getting along, living in peace, and not bombing each other.

Now because I'm a psychologist and not a politician, I focus on the
psychology of thinking and languaging.  For years, my focus as been on
enabling people to do critical thinking so they can communicate clearly,
precisely, and rationally.  That's why I focus on facts, not fantasies.
That's why I emphasized the fact, We cannot change the past. So living in
the past, demanding it be changed perpetuates suffering and does not lead to
healing.  Living in the past and staying angry, revengeful, and hateful
about the past solves nothing.  Pointing out some facts about Hamas also
does not mean that I think Israel is blameless in the conflict.  I do not.

As a psychotherapist, my focus has been on creating the kind of life that we
all want in the future and what we can do in the future when the war is
over.  I have written about the importance of trauma recovery, the
development of resilience, emotional mastery, and resourcefulness.  I have
written that we have to fight against hate, revenge, rage, and intolerance.
Conversely, we need to promote acceptance, tolerance, and forgiveness.  Yes,
I know that those in the war right now are not in the place to forgive-not
right now.

Now because I think Hamas ought to release the hostages and agree to a
ceasefire, some have falsely assumed that I'm against the Palestinians and
against Islam.  I am not.  I am for the Palestinian people and for Moslems.
If I had my way, not a single additional Palestinian would die or be wounded
from this day forward.

What I care about are the people in Palestine who are the ones now being
traumatized as Israel continues their war against Hamas.  I care that they
are caught in the middle of the bombing and are suffering tremendously as
people are dying and being wounded, as homes are being destroyed, etc.  They
live in fear and dread.  Yet one day, they will need the healing touch of
compassion to help them recover from this actual trauma. 

Others, however, who do not live in Palestine, they are actually not
suffering from the war; they are not experiencing the bombing, the
devastation, the daily struggle for food and water.  Does it affect them?
Sure.   Yet they are experiencing a different kind of trauma- vicarious
trauma.  Actually, nothing bad is happening to them.  Instead they are
watching the war on TV, and in social media, and traumatizing themselves
about it.  

How are they doing that?  They are doing this by personalizing and
emotionalizing.  They are doing this by catastrophizing and
over-generalizing.  This obviously makes their lives miserable; and as it is
stressing them out, it is reducing their ability for clear thinking whereby
they could be more helpful and healing to those in the actual trauma.
Theirs is not a true trauma.  It is a vicarious trauma.  And the healing for
that is very different from the trauma recovery for those in Palestine.  To
be healed from vicarious trauma, they will have to identify and let go of
the cognitive distortions in their thinking.

What do I think?  I think we need to move beyond the cycles of hate and
revenge; I think we need to establish cycles of tolerance and cultivate love
for all people.  As it will take time, it will require loads of patience,
persistence, and commitment.

L. Michael Hall, Ph.D.

ISNS Executive Director

738 Beaver Lodge

Grand Jct., CO. 81505 USA

(970) 523-7877

drhall at acsol.net  

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