[Neurons] 2021 Neurons #3 IT'S INSIDE-OUT

[Michael Hall]

From: L. Michael Hall   

2021 Neurons #3

January 18, 2021

High Quality Living #3

 

IT'S AN INSIDE-OUT PROCESS

 

I noted in the post last week that the process for designing and living your
own high quality life is an inside-out process.  It is not something to be
added to you as if you were deficient, it is something that arises from
within, that develops within, and that then manifests itself externally.
Take the world-wide lock-down, for example.  We're still locked-down here in
Colorado as we have been for the past 11 months.  Every day when I get up,
all around me are all sorts of constraints- some make sense, many more do
not.  Yet while there are so many external constraints preventing all sorts
of freedoms- I myself am not locked down, I am free and will continue to
live free.

 

I'm free because I choose my actions, my talk, my thoughts, and my emotions.
No one is "making" me feel anything, whatever I feel is my response and
response-ability.  It is my response that I create using my thoughts and
that I express verbally and behaviorally.  My freedom is an inside-out
freedom.  It is not dependent on whatever "prison" I may physically be in-
whatever constraints and limitations to my freedom.

 

Freedom, like a thousand other central human experiences, is an inside-out
phenomena.  If I'm not free on the inside, no amount of external physical
freedom will help.  But if I am internally free, then that inner freedom
will enable me to live a high quality life.  So it is with thinking and
emoting.  If you are free in your thinking-and-emoting, then it is because
you have developed your capacities.  You are capable of thinking regardless
of the intellectual environment that you live in.  You have cultivated your
thinking skills- and most of all, your executive thinking skills.  Thinking
is definitely an inside-out phenomenon and experience.

 

So also with emoting.  Awareness of your thinking about yourself, others,
environment, or any particular subject enables you to be aware of how you
generate your emotions.  And from emotional-awareness comes all of the other
inherent skills that comprise emotional intelligence: emotional tracking,
emotional registering, emotional management, emotional relating.  Here's
another set of inside-out competencies.  With them you know how to detect
your emotions, be aware of them, register them, and regulate them.  Yes,
external things can still trigger them, yet even when they do, you know your
emotions are your responses.  They are within your power.

 

Obviously, your speech and behavior are inside-out processes and because
they are, so is everything that you and I do with our linguistic and
behavioral powers- selling, persuasion, resilience, decision-making, humor
hypnotic trance, leading, managing, parenting, coaching, training, etc.

 

What does all of these mean?  Several highly significant things.  First, to
succeed on the outside, first take care of the inside.  Success comes to
those who first win the "inner game."  When you win the inner game, the
outer game is a cinch.  But if you focus only on the "outer game," as many
salespeople do, as many managers do, as many leaders do, etc., then the
chance of success reduces by probably 90% or more.

 

90% or more!  Those are not good odds!  So as we often say, if you don't
have your head on right- you won't get very far.  You will more than likely
mess things up.  That's why in Neuro-Semantic NLP, we focus first and
foremost on the inner game, the meta-game.  To that end I wrote several
books on that theme: Games Business Experts Play, Games Great Lovers Play,
Games for Mastering Fear, Games Fit and Slim People Play.  This also
explains the name that we trademarked for our brand of coaching,
Meta-Coaching. 

 

Nor is any of this new.  More than a century ago, Napoleon Hill wrote Think
and Grow Rich.  The idea of the best things human being inside-out has been
around for a long time.  We can even go back two thousand years to the time
of Christ and there also is the theme, first the heart, then the mouth.
"Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.  A good man out of the
good treasure of the heart brings forth good things..." (Matthew 12;34-35).

 

The principle is easy to understand and hard to apply.  It is so much easier
to focus on the outside.  The outside, after all, seems so much more
available and present.  It seems to be at your beck and call.  The inside is
more difficult to get to due to all of the ego-defenses, self-blindness, and
cognitive biases.   Yet if you want high quality living, it begins with the
trip inside and the development inside.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

L. Michael Hall, Ph.D.

Executive Director, Neuro-Semantics

P.O. Box 8

Clifton CO. 81520 USA

www.neurosemantics.com 

 

To unsubscribe to Neurons, send request to meta at acsol.net 

Resilience is one of the most powerful meta-states possible --- the modeling
of resilience launched Neuro-Semantics ...  in a world where things can go
wrong--- we need RESILIENCE (2020).

 

 

 

130513 Neuro Semantics Resilience Book FRONT Cover

 

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