[Neurons] 2017 Neurons #34 Creatively Experimenting

Mon Aug 7 07:21:19 EDT 2017

From: L. Michael Hall

2017 Neurons #34

August 7, 2017

CREATIVELY EXPERIMENTING

Earlier this year I write a dozen posts on basic NLP concepts.  While that
series covered most, it did not include every concept.  So, here's another
basic NLP concept.   It is not one of the formal NLP Presuppositions, yet it
is one of the common statements that NLP Practitioners use in their work.
And it is one that offers a basic guideline or heuristic for being more
effective in communicating and being productive.  Here it is: 

If what you are doing is not working-do something different.  

Now while it is a great idea and probably seems obvious, the fact is that
most of us do not actually operate by this basic concept.   Test yourself.

.                  "How often do you keep repeating some action or way of
talking or way of thinking especially when it is not working and has not
worked?  Do you ever do that?"

.                  "How many times should I attempt to do something when it
does not work before moving on and trying something else?"

Good questions.  Obviously, if you think that you know something to do that
has a good chance of working, you will want to give it a good try.  You will
want to do it from your best state when you are feeling good and persist
over a period of time in a realistic way.  After that, if you are still not
getting the results you want and realistically expect- then try something
else.

This is really crucial in communication.  If you want a different response
from another person, and the things you are doing are not getting the
responses you want- do something different.  The idea is that after you have
demonstrated that something is not working, stop doing it.  What many in NLP
then quote is the Einstein quote: "Insanity is keep doing the same thing and
hoping for a different result."  Another great quote of immense wisdom!

So what's the problem?  Ah, a cognitive bias and a thinking fallacy that
gets us all- investment.  Once you have invested in something- it becomes
harder and harder to give it up.  Even investing in a way of thinking, way
of feeling, way of talking, way of acting, way of relating- in each you are
investing your mental and emotional energies, you are investing in what you
think will work.  So quitting, giving up, stopping - that's hard.  Yet if
something is not working and you keep doing it- you are now engaging in
self-defeating behavior.

Another basic communication concept at work here is this: You are always
getting a response.  So look at it!  Recognizing that you are always getting
a response, and always will, then if it is not the desired response that you
are hoping for, the most effective thing to do is something different.   Say
what you are saying in a different way, use your non-verbal expressions
differently, use some different words, change the context, etc.  If you want
the same response, just repeat what you did.

Applying this to communication leads us to realize this: You always succeed
when you communicate because you always get a response.  How about that?
You always succeed!  The question now is- what are you successfully
generating?  Is that response which you are getting, the response you want?
You never fail, and cannot fail simply because you always succeed in getting
some response even if it is not a response that you want.  This frame takes
your communications and actions out of the realm of success or failure.  It
puts it into the realm of quality - is the response you are successfully
getting the quality of response that you want?  If not, change your
response.   When the response isn't the response you aimed for, take that
situation as an opportunity to experiment.  Try different things to find out
what other responses you will receive.

And all of this takes us to the subject of creativity- creating a new a
different response.  After all, this is what creative people do- they
experiment.  They keep checking the results that they are getting and if it
is not succeeding in getting the desired results, they experiment with what
else they could do.  How about you?  Is that how you operate?  

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